Since the nine-part series, Masters of the Air, began on Apple TV, I have been asked this question.
Yes, I have posted just a few (ha) links and stories, but no,
my father is not listed by name. I see no actor connected with the name Co-pilot William J. Styles.
And yet… Here’s what I do know.
I will see my father in every episode.
He’ll be there in the right seat checking the instruments.
I’ll see him lift above the clouds, cross the ocean, kiss Mom’s photo,
dance in the pub. He’ll be there playing cards,
trying to figure out the English money.
I’ll see him suit up at dawn, climb in the B-17
for his first mission with the 100th Bomb Group.
I will see his rosary dangle from the cockpit.
Later he’ll be writing a letter, riding a bike,
watching the sky, marking off missions.
Every time I see a B-17 take off, I’ll see Dad.
I’ll see him tremble with fear facing the flak,
and plunging into the North Sea. I’ll see him wipe
tears when his crewmen sink with the B-17.
I’ll hear the German soldiers order him to surrender.
I watch the door slam in the interrogation room.
I will see his fingerprints on the pink card.
He’ll be along the pines walking into Stalag Luft III.
Maybe I’ll hear his nickname, Stiff, called out.
I see him smoke, spit out rancid soup, read and
draw in his POW logbook. I’ll hear him take a side
in the discussions called flaps. I watch him hoard food,
roll one M &M between his fingers, savoring the sweet.
I’ll hear him thank the Red Cross and say a prayer.
I’ll be watching when he steps into the long line
standing in the snow. I’ll watch him march,
and hand his POW book to a German woman praying that
she will return it after the war. Oh yes, Dad will be in those
episodes, holding up a roommate. I’ll see his frosty breath, and hear
his moans. I’ll see his bloody feet crawling in the old factory
trying to get warm. I’ll watch him vomit in the boxcar, scratch
his skin covered with fleas and lice. I’ll watch his weight disappear,
his energy leave. And then, in one episode, I’ll see him smile
and hear his scream and watch him run toward our American flag.
He’ll be the one hugging and shouting for joy.